Stupid Headlines

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter 
This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this.. It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!! They put in a correction the next day.


Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says 
Really? You think? 



Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers 
Now that's taking things a bit far! 


 

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over 
What a guy! 



Miners Refuse to Work after Death 
No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so's! 



Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant 
See if that works any better than a fair trial! 



War Dims Hope for Peace 
I can see where it might have that effect! 



If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile 
Really?! 



Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures 
Who would have thought! 



Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide 
They may be on to something! 



Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges 
You mean there's something stronger than duct tape? 



Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge 
He probably IS the battery charge! 



New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group 
Weren't they fat enough?! 



Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft 
That's what he gets for eating those beans! 



Kids Make Nutritious Snacks 
Do they taste like chicken?



Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half 
Chainsaw Massacre all over again! 



Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors 
Boy, are they tall! 



And the winner is.... 
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead 

Did I read that right? 

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